a new job beckon ? A new hobby ? A new relationship ? A new step in your finances ? A new fashion look ?
Give yourself permission to explore possibilities and let yourself get excited about them . Just this act , in itself , is a gift . And if you need an excuse to cut loose from some of the old habits and constraints of your normal family ways of doing things , blame it on spring !
Once you settle on one particular change , explore your emotions . What feelings come up when you imagine yourself doing this new thing ? Are they positive ? Negative ? Don ’ t judge . Just take note and jot all your feelings down .
Let ’ s say the idea of a new love relationship excites you , but misgivings show up . Maybe it even scares you . Explore relationship patterns in your family system to see if this fear even belongs to you . As we saw with Louise , emotional patterns take root and travel through the generations . You may well have inherited your fear from a parent or sibling or even an earlier ancestor who got badly burned in a love affair . Take note of the way you ’ re thinking . Do certain negative thoughts predominate ? “ I ’ m not attractive enough to find a great love . Good relationships don ’ t happen in our family . I ’ m not deserving enough .” Or how about , “ Love is overrated .” Or “ Love makes you weak .”
Just like emotions , thought patterns , words and sayings — something called systemic sentences — travel through the family line . We end up thinking and saying things automatically , never realizing these thoughts don ’ t really belong to us . Louise had some real zingers running through her head . “ People who need attention are just begging for trouble ” was one systemic sentence . Another was “ Just keep your head down , don ’ t ask for much , and things will work out fine .” How could she possibly stand out and
Acknowledge and thank the old patterns for the wisdom they have provided , then put them down and create new thoughts and feelings you can believe in deeply to replace them .
shine in a sales profession with thoughts like that running the show ?
So , get a broom and sweep those old dusty thoughts from your focus . Acknowledge and thank the old patterns for the wisdom they have provided , then put them down and create new thoughts and feelings you can believe in deeply to replace them . Grab a cloth and polish the windows to your soul . Stand in front of a mirror , look yourself in the eye and tell yourself it ’ s not just okay to have a new love — or a new car or a new job or a new puppy — in your life . It ’ s your destiny . After all , it ’ s just a part of spring cleaning .
JUDY WILKINS-SMITH - Judy , author of Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint : A Powerful Guide to Transformation Through Disentangling Multigenerational Patterns , is a highly-regarded , international organizational , individual and family patterns expert , systemic coach , trainer , facilitator , leadership conference and motivational speaker and founder of System Dynamics for Individuals & Organizations . For more information :
judywilkins-smith . com